Patching the Holes (A Love Analogy)

Bordering Beautiful

For anyone who suffers from BPD, PTSD, or past relationship trauma: pay attention. For anyone who has lived through relationship hell and attempted to love again: this is for you.


Sometimes I find myself speaking to my current spouse as if he were the last one. The one who used me, demeaned me, humiliated me, and objectified me. Sometimes I find myself triggered by things he says, and it isn鈥檛 even him. It鈥檚 like suddenly, I hear the old voice yelling the same words he is muttering; and I react as if I鈥檓 speaking to the old, rather than the new. As you could probably imagine (or maybe you know from experience), this can kill any 鈥渘ew love鈥 buzz. Because our new loves just don鈥檛 deserve that.

It鈥檚 a real eye opener to realize that the love you are so used to, wasn鈥檛 love at all. But it鈥

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